A first-time Burning Man reveler has recounted that while the festival has its wild side, revelers complained that its orgies were 'lame'.
Business Insider writer Zoe Bernard went to the eight-day arts and culture festival last month to write about how wild the event, that attracts 70,000 revelers, really is.
Bernard penned a piece for Business Insider about her time in the temporary city known as the playa, north of Reno, Nevada, with two friends. Before she arrived, she was under the impression the party would be 'like Woodstock with less shade' mixed with 'some weird sex stuff'.
But once there, one of her campmates complained that the 'Orgy Dome is so boring' and men and women were required to listen through a 'long lecture about consent'.
While speaking of the kinky dome further, one of Bernard's campmates complained that they had 'to wait in line forever' and 'once you get in, it's the most organized sex you'll ever have in your life'.
Another reveler agreed - and chimed to add that the dome is a great place for a nap.
But outside the Orgy Dome, debauchery unfolded.
This included 'naked women wielding leather paddles implore bystanders to pull their pants down for a spanking' and 'couples bedecked in feathers and dust masks' as they prepared for their wild adventures.
'Nudity is ubiquitous, and informally enforced in bizarre and ridiculous ways.
'Several ramshackle bars require women to bare their breasts if they wish to drink there.'
One man in the camp said he had to show his penis to get a snow cone.
Even more questionable, there was a 'small sampling of activities available [such as] fellatio contests, something advertised as "p---y massages"' and 'genital prints made in the "traditional Japanese method."'
There was such a thing as Slut Olympics and a Bubbles and Boobs VIP Party that was advertised, 'Bring your boobs!'
One workshop at the festival allowed revelers to learn to 'write erotic poetry in binary code (010101).'
Many meals consisted of chili with a side of MDMA, warm Modelo, sardines and pickles.
One campmate even said: 'I think I'm immune to drugs... I've taken so much LSD that it no longer has any effect on me.'
Bernard recalled that the air reeked of weed and mothballs. 'Throbbing EDM music' blared at all hours.
Next to a spiritual foot wash booth, there was a sign that promoted abortions for free.
'Anything and everything you could imagine exists here... at the Healing Foot Wash down the road, you can wash your neighbor's feet and hear all about the love of your prospective savior Jesus Christ.
'Just blocks from the Healing Foot Wash, another camp's sign announces "Free Abortions!" with the words "No minors allowed!" scrawled in marker underneath.'
And just minutes down the road, toddlers played at Kindergarten Kamp.
Overall, Bernard said during her time in Black Rock City, she was 'welcomed home hundreds of times by strangers whose eyes are filled, almost uniformly, with the clear light of loving-kindness and acceptance.
It was like 'being at a family reunion after coming out of a coma except every member of your family is an extremely attractive yoga instructor,' she added.